Bone Tired

The title doesn't even begin to describe the extreme exhaustion the last three days have brought about. Remembrances of the weekend flit through my brain too quickly for me to capture them in words. Too much to even record in fragments. It is enough that I am upright, though I won't be for long.

To bed. Perhaps more tomorrow.

Day Two of Three

Two days into our opening weekend of the Dickens Fair and too exhausted to write a full recap. Hold onto your hats until Monday. I may have the energy then. For now it's dinner and then bed. Up to early to do it all again tomorrow.

Quote of the Day

"You should never underestimate the predictability of stupidity."

Bullet Tooth Tony, Snatch

The Great Dickens Christmas Fair

30 Years and Going Strong!

The Great Dickens Christmas Fair transforms the Cow Palace in Daly City into an authentic recreation of Victorian London - the Bay Area's best holiday "stay-cation" of 2008!

The 30th Annual Great Dickens Christmas Fair
Four Weekends including the Friday after Thanksgiving
28 November through 21 December 2008
11 am - 7 pm in the Cow Palace Exhibition Halls

The day after Thanksgiving, escape to London, England and a Victorian wonderland of waltzing, laughing, feasting, singing and shopping for treasures. The only event of its kind in the world, featuring 600 performers. We have transformed 100,000 square feet of the Cow Palace Exhibition Halls into "London in San Francisco."

Charles Dickens' message is even more relevant today: that kindness and caring are better than greed and distrust.

Guests of all ages will delight in entertainments on six stages and throughout the streets of "Old London Town."
Here's a small sample of what's new this year:

• The Metropolitan Music Hall at the Victoria & Albert Theatre
• The fabulous Habbi Ru Middle Eastern Dancers
• An All-new Saucy French Postcard Revue!
• New juried crafts booths including Dancing Flame Candles, Toadstool Fairy Art, Plumania Feather Creations, Doone's Dejavu and Allen Jeffrey's Fine Gentlemen's Attire
• A Children's Tour of London
• The Punch & Judy Stage

By coming early in the season, you will enjoy the best selection in fine and-crafted gifts, from first edition prints, glassworks, and pewter goblets to clothing, jewelry, toys and Christmas florals. From sugar plums to hot buttered rum it all awaits you at the Great Dickens Christmas Fair and Victorian Holiday Party!

Tickets are only $19.00 when you order online today (price at the gate is $22.00). Enjoy the convenience of having your tickets waiting for you at Will Call. Children 5 and under are free, and kids ages 5-11 are always discounted at only $10.00. For Group Discounts (15 or more), call (800) 510-1558 for ordering.

Do Join Us, Won't You?

The Day Before

Too much to do before tomorrow and Friday and not enough time to write. Today has run away.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

The Hetrosexual Questionnaire

This is passed along via the lovely folks over at Queers United. Enjoy!


This is a fun survey, but also an activist survey. Please repost this to your email list, blog it or use it in a group setting. Have fun with it but also let the point be made.

1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?

2. When and where did you decide you were a heterosexual?

3. Is it possible this is just a phase and you will out grow it?

4. Is it possible that your sexual orientation has stemmed from a neurotic fear of others of the same sex?

5. Do your parents know you are straight? Do your friends know- how did they react?

6. If you have never slept with a person of the same sex, is it just possible that all you need is a good gay lover?

7. Why do you insist on flaunting your heterosexuality... can’t you just be who you are and keep it quiet?

8. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?

9. Why do heterosexuals try to recruit others into this lifestyle?

10. A disproportionate majority of child molesters are heterosexual... Do you consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers?

11. Just what do men and women do in bed together? How can they truly know how to please each other, being so anatomically different?

12. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?

13. How can you become a whole person if you limit yourself to compulsive, exclusive heterosexuality?

14. Considering the menace of overpopulation how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual?

15. Could you trust a heterosexual therapist to be objective? Don't you feel that he or she might be inclined to influence you in the direction of his orher leanings?

16. There seem to very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed that might enable you to change if you really want to.

17. Have you considered trying aversion therapy?

- Martin Rochlin, Ph.D., 1972

From the Trenches

The first in a possible series entitled, "Songs my Father Taught Me" or "Unconventional Lullabies."

The Bells of Hell
from Songs and Slang of the British Soldier 1914-1918 by John Brophy

The bells of hell go ding-a-ling-a-ling
For you but not for me
And the little devils how they sing-a-ling-a-ling
The sing so merrily

O death, where is thy sting-a-ling-a-ling
O grave, thy victory?
The bells of hell go ding-a-ling-a-ling
For you but not for me


Good night, my darlings.

Good Company

Due to my recent online activism with regards to the aborted protest by the Westboro Baptist Church of Alameda High School's production of The Laramie Project, this blog is now linked from the news section of the God Hates Fags website.

This post was linked with the label: "Check out this freak 'mommy'- and she is different from all other american/worldly mothers, how? Not at all!"

The wonderful folks at Queers United were mentioned as well, just seven spaces below mine, so I'm in the best of all possible company.

I have to laugh at the fact that I am labeled as a freak while also being called completely normal. Color me amused.

I Am One of the Ruins That Cromwell Knocked About A Bit

While driving home from a full day of teaching Yanks to speak old-fashioned Victorian-era Cockney, coaching acts and rehearsing in preparation for the opening next week of the 30th Annual Dickens Christmas Fair, I composed a chatty and full blog entry in my head. I ran over the events of the day, things that made me chuckle, things that felt victorious, things that I thought may hold some interest for you anonymous readers. It helped to pass the time on the drive home and keep me alert after an exhausting 10 hours on my feet.

Two hours later I sit here shivering in the studio, a bit hungry and more than a little tired, all the amusing anecdotes of the day have fled my brain.

And then I remembered this. I feel it is important to learn as many new things as you can and today I expanded my acting repertoire. I play two of Charles Dickens characters at the Fair: the beloved Peggotty from David Copperfield and, at the complete opposite end of the spectrum, one of Dickens' great grotesques, Sairey Gamp, midwife, nurse and layer-out-of-the-dead from Martin Chuzzlewit.

Sairey Gamp is known (among other traits) as partaking liberally of snuff. I have never had the stuff, last year being content to go through the motions without ever having actually done it. As promised to me last weekend, one of my friends and fellow cast members Jon DeCles (an astounding Mr Micawber) presented me with two different varieties of snuff and a brief lesson on the ritual of inhaling tobacco. While not being something I will make a habit of, the ritual and experience was wonderful and gave me even more insight to properly portray her avid snuff use on the streets of the Fair.

I ramble on as my weary brain begins to long for sleep. Mostly I wanted to share with you a wonderful YouTube video recording of a song made famous by the Queen of the Music Halls, Marie Lloyd with the wonderful title, I Am One of the Ruins That Cromwell Knocked About a Bit. In this recording it is sung by her daughter, as sadly Marie never recorded this during her lifetime, but Marie Jr. manages to do her mother proud by infusing her rendition with the proper Cockney swagger in her voice. Of special note is the long patter in the middle of the song, a lovely display of Victorian Cockney pronunciation and slang that has been abandon by the contemporary denizens of London's East End over the last century.

This link will take you directly to hear the song. My gift to you. Sit back, have a pint and enjoy.

Sometimes There is No Compelling Reason Why

Alternate Title: Why I am a Terrible Mother

Arabis: Mommy, want cookies for breakfast!

Me: No, sweetie. Cookies are not for breakfast. Would you like an egg and toast (her favorite)?

Arabis: No, thank you. Want cookies!

Me: No cookies for breakfast. Maybe we can have a cookie for dessert. How about a bowl of cereal and some strawberries?

Arabis: No! Want cookies and a glass of milk. PLEEEEEEASE?

Me: Sorry, ducks. No cookies for breakfast.

Arabis: Why?

And you know what? Damned if I couldn't think of one reason why. So we had cookies and milk for breakfast (for those wondering, they were Trader Joe's Shortbread cookies with fruit filing and chocolate filling. At least there were no crappy preservatives).

They were really good, too!

Random Mumblings

Copied from PicaboMama over at Heathen Family Revival (best blog name ever), here's a tantrum-free post.

1. Who did you spend at least two hours with today?
Arabis, my Evil Minion and beloved goof-ball.

2. What do you look forward to most in the next six weeks?
The 30th Annual Great Dickens Christmas Fair!

3. Who was the last person you called?
Mojo

4. What were you doing at 12am last night?
Watching mindless television while trying to finish a knitting commission.

5. What did you fear was going to get you as a child?
Infinity. I had serious issues with the concept of infinity. I used to fall down the rabbit hole of thought and lose myself in pondering exactly what it meant, which I couldn't (and still can't, if I let myself really think about it) fathom. Infinity was my monster under the carpet, the thing that lurked in the corners and in the closet at night. MC Escher drawings were a fascination and a nightmare all at once.

Yes. I was an odd child. Next question?

6. When did you last see your mom?
Tuesday night.

7. What are you wearing right now?
A pair of cropped sweat pants and a tank top. I'm shivering. It's cold in here.

8. Where is your favorite place to be?
In the ocean. Or barring that, at the very least on the coast.

9. Where is your least favorite place to be?
I've got to go with Kelly on this one: anywhere I don't have an easy exit, for example: uncomfortable social obligations and family weddings.

10. Where would you go if you could go anywhere?
London. Or to take Arabis and visit my dad for an extended period.

11. Where do you think you’ll be in 10 years?
Where the wind takes me.

12. What was the last thing that really made you laugh?
This sounds pathetic as hell, but right now I can't remember. It's been a glum week. I'll hazard that watching an old episode of "The Graham Norton Show" on the DVR last night elic

13. What cities/towns/villages have you lived in?
San Francisco (born at St. Francis Hospital on the feast day of...you guessed it....Saint Francis)
Corte Madera, CA
Oakland, CA
Kittery, ME
London, England (specifically Hounslow and West Hampstead)

14. Are you a social person?
Pre-motherhood, I would say no, which surprises many people. I'm an introvert. Really.

Post-motherhood has found me isolated and craving the company of anyone over the age of three. And fruity rum drinks. That is another craving given me by motherhood.

15. What do you like about winter?
Rain. Fog. The Dickens Fair (see above).


Round Two -
Unconscious Mutterings:

I say … and you think … ?

Coverage - ground
Cynical - heh
Gust - wind
Improvised - my forte
V - sod off, ya tosser
Guests - ohmygodIhavetocleanthefreakinghouse!!!!!!!!!
Brutal - my brainmeats
Grant - bestow
Pull - push
streaming- consciousness

Stream of Consciousness Rant

I'm angry tonight for a variety of reasons that really don't need to be posted for the world to see. Nothing to do with my immediate family or mate, just an urge to scream and break bottles against a concrete wall.

There are a few things that come to mind. Of course, there always are. Passive-aggressive people. Those who don't come right out and say what they want or mean but must beat about the bush. Creditors. The patriarchy. Ex-friends who still exist on the perimeters of one's world, spreading their own skewed brand of truth. Pompous windbags. The poorly socialized. Stalkers. People who can't let go.

I'm broke. I've gotten a few knitting commissions that are giving me gas money and cash for sundries. And I am making this post quickly, so I can go back to them.

I'm tired of struggling.

And I wonder, who the fuck are you people, who stop by this blog once or twice a day? What do you get from this, you internet voyeurs, who leave no comments, no trace of your passing other than what my site counter tells me?

Why do I bother doing this? Am I writing for me or you?

Tuesday

Home from an exhausting 39 hours in my mother's neck of the woods. The arterioscopy on her left leg is now done. Too tired to go into details. To bed.

Word of the Day

Knackered.

Sunday Night Brain Drain

Up too early to take my mother to the doctor for the second stereoscopy other leg. Too tired to write. Long day of teaching and rehearsing.

I have become addicted to Scramble. It is evil.

A Loving Reminder

A loving reminder:

Theater NOT drama.

Repeat as often as necessary.

For Everyone Doing NaNoWriMo and All Us Crazy Dumbsaints

Jack Kerouac's Belief & Technique for Modern Prose

List of Essentials

1. Scribbled secret notebooks, and wild typewritten pages, for yr own joy
2. Submissive to everything, open listening
   
3. Try never get drunk outside yr own house
   
4. Be in love with yr life
   
5. Something that you feel will find its own form
   
6. Be crazy dumbsaint of the mind
   
7. Blow as deep as you want to blow
   
8. Write what you want bottomless from bottom of the mind
   
9. The unspeakable visions of the individual
   
10. No time for poetry but exactly what is
    
11. Visionary tics shivering in the chest
    
12. In tranced fixation dreaming upon object before you
    
13. Remove literary, grammatical and syntactical inhibition
    
14. Like Proust be an old teahead of time
    
15. Telling the true story of the world in interior monolog
    
16. The jewel center of interest is the eye within the eye
    
17. Write in recollection and amazement for yourself
    
18. Work from pithy middle eye out, swimming in language sea
    
19. Accept loss forever
    
20. Believe in the holy contour of life
    
21. Struggle to sketch the flow that already exists intact in mind
    
22. Don't think of words when you stop but to see picture better
    
23. Keep track of every day the date emblazoned in yr morning
    
24. No fear or shame in the dignity of yr experience, language & knowledge
    
25. Write for the world to read and see yr exact pictures of it
    
26. Bookmovie is the movie in words, the visual American form
    
27. In Praise of Character in the Bleak inhuman Lonliness
    
28. Composing wild, undisciplined, pure, coming in from under, crazier the better
    
29. You're a Genius all the time
    
30. Writer-Director of Earthly movies Sponsored & Angeled in Heaven
    

Alameda High Presents "The Laramie Project"

To bring everyone up to date, there was to be a protest by a group of right-wing fundamentalists on a student production of The Laramie Project at Alameda High School. Info can be found on Queers United. This post is an update to that.

I just spoke with Captain Brock of the Alameda Police Department. As of today, the protest by the Westboro Baptist Church has been canceled.

He was notified of the event yesterday, when a concerned parent of a student called him. He contacted the Westboro Baptist Church and spoke with Phelps' daughter. According to her, they are *NOT* coming to Alameda, but instead are going directly to Hawaii to protest at the funeral of President Elect Obama's grandmother.

Captain Brock took this all very seriously, making numerous phone calls to the Topeka Kansas police dept and the Westboro Baptist Church itself. According to the Topeka police, the WBC always notify the local police where ever they plan to be, to ensure their First Amendment rights are upheld. They also tend to get a lot of counter demonstrators when they come to California and their groups are very small, generally between 10 and 15 people. Captain Brock also met with local Alameda LGBT groups.

The listing is supposed to be removed from the website (although it has not been as of this posting). Captain Brock is aware of this. When I asked if he was concerned about other, more local Phelp's supporters seeing this and showing up, he seemed confident that that would not happen, as the WBC tends to fly all its people in as a group.

Captain Brock assured me there will be a police presence tomorrow night and that they are also organizing a candle-light vigil in support of the students, the local LGBT community and Matthew Shepherd. This will happen a bit away from the school grounds at 6:00 PM.

Please come show your support of Alameda High School and their courageous theatre department by attending the performance after the vigil.

The show starts at 7:30 PM.

Alameda High School Little Theater
2201 Encinal Avenue, Alameda CA
Tickets cost $10 for adults, $7 for students.

Wisdom from Uncle Jack

Thinking of the stars night after night I begin to realize "the stars are words" and all the innumerable worlds in the Milky Way are words, and so is this world too. And I realize that no matter where I am, whether in a little room full of thought, or in this endless universe of stars and mountains, it's all in my mind. There's no need for solitude. So love life for what it is, and form no preconceptions whatever in your mind.

Jack Kerouac, Lonesome Traveler

Please Help

This Friday, 14 November 2008, Fred Phelps of the Westboro Baptist Church has announced that he will protest Alameda High School's production of The Laramie Project. The group plans to picket between 6:45 PM and 7:30 PM.

As a counter-protest and buffer of support and protection to the students producing the play and theater-goers, requests are being made for support. Please show up at 6:00 PM at the following location:

Alameda High School
2201 Encinal Avenue
Alameda, CA 94501

I want to quote to you from a flier on Westboro Baptist Church's website:

"...God hates the Alameda High School Little Theater and all and everybody having anything to do with spreading sodomite lies via this tacky bit of cheap, fag propaganda masquerading as legitimate theater."

For more information please visit Queers United and The Island.

Cockney Pride Begins in the 'Ome

Arabis has been "helping" me with my materials for the cockney class I've begun teaching to performers in preparation for the Great Dickens Christmas Fair. I've been doing quite a bit of reading aloud which I didn't think anything about until today, when she asked for a banana (!) and replied with "Fank you" after being handed one.

And earlier she broke a crayon while coloring and exclaimed, "Bugger all!"

I'm doomed.

Ramblings on Motherhood Written by a Brain of Little Sleep

I am spent. Utterly exhausted. While talking with Surrey after teaching our last class yesterday, I realized that in this one weekend I have spoken and interacted with more people than I have the entire year. It is a little overwhelming, but my brain is starved for the intellectual stimulation.

I love being my daughter's mother, but there are so many identity issues around becoming one. The transition into motherhood causes one to explore and question identity. Especially if, like me, you come to it unexpectedly and rather late in life.

I have done so many things with my life, worn so many monikers, swirled them about me like Salome's veils and shed them when they were no longer apt or when I could no longer support their weight. Artist, writer, actor, dancer, fight choreographer, educator, athlete, director...and now mother. In some ways, each built on the other, skill enhancing skill, art strengthening art. And because I've had such a full life already, in a simpler world it would seem the transition to motherhood would build on all the others.

If you buy that, I've also got a bridge in Brooklyn that you might be interested in.

These last three years have been a struggle and internal chaos in the presence of the most immense love and perfection I have ever known. The conflict is intense. Arabis is my joy. I had almost given up on ever having a child. It certainly was no longer in my mind after my divorce. And the moment I felt her growing inside me, I felt the fiercest and strongest emotions I will ever know. But she grew in the midst of so much turmoil, my own brain having long been known as my own worst enemy.

When I held my daughter for the first time, whispered her secret name in her ear and spoke to her softly in Armenian, being a mother was enough. There was nothing else.

It is who I am: Arabis' mother, but it is not ALL that I am. All that came before, all that I have done, all the people I have loved that make me who I am contribute to it. I am mother and so much more.

But when all your time is spent with a small child, the rest can fade to the background and seem like another world. There is a mourning for the past as well as a joy in the present and I wonder that more women don't speak of this for fear of seeming unloving or ungrateful of just purely unnatural.

I remind myself daily that she is only small once and that this time is so precious and so fleeting. Watching her and learning the world anew through her is a joy like nothing I have ever experienced. But I feel my life on hold, while I give her as much of me as I can, *while* I can, to help her walk strong and confident in the world.

I am finding myself anew while she is discovering who she is. Perhaps it is a parallel process. The thing I am learning not to do, trying not do, and it is the hardest for me, is mourn the past, mourn who I was. Pregnancy wrecked havoc on my body and I have still not recovered. I still carry much of the baby weight, exacerbating my old dance injuries. I will never be the athlete I was before.

A chrysalis phase? Metamorphosis. As long as I don't end up a cockroach at the end of the journey, I think I'm doing okay.

Content

A long, exhausting and fulfilling weekend is past. I have taught, I have played, I have rehearsed. I have reconnected with people from almost 30 years past, met knew ones and relaxed into the embrace of those that have been there all along.

What a crazy life I've led. If I stop to think of all the things I've done, it almost makes my head spin.

I'm talked out. I've got nothing left even for introspection right now. Mostly I just sit here in the glow of the screen, one cat draped across my shoulders and another perched, gargoyle-like, on the monitor before me. There is the soft, indecipherable hum of the television from the other room and I suspect that if I venture in, Mojo will have fallen fast asleep in front of it.

And really, sleep is where I should be. The allure is undeniable. Time to get flat.

I've Been Remiss

So here it is, the eighth day of November and I've not "officially" announced my participation in this year's NaBloPoMo. Although I'm sure that you, my two astute readers, will have figured out by now that I am participating.

This will be my third year in a row and I promised myself more actual writing would get done; something humorous, a little witty, maybe some thought provoking prose and possibly even an attempt to wring a tear or two from your jaded eyes.

So what have the last eight days found me doing? Running through my crazy days after my three year old and finally collapsing around 11 at night only to realize mere minutes from the clock tolling away the last hour of the day that "OhmygodIhaven'tpostedyet!!!!!!" Thus begins the mad dash to the computer, my eyes bleary and tired, staring at the blank screen, trying to pull something remotely interesting from a brain whose synapses no longer even spark let alone fire.

Today I am starting a little earlier, but I indulged in a bout of insomnia last night that left me with only three and a half hours of sleep. And then a full seven hours of workshops and rehearsals in preparation for the 30th Dickens Christmas Fair have left me giddy and almost falling asleep on my keyboard.

This is the best I can do for now. So let me ask a boon of you, anonymous reader. I know I have a few regulars. Leave a comment. Say hello. Tell me how you found my and why the heck you come back to read my sporadic and often sparse ramblings. Indulge my curiosity.

Just for the hell of it.

Crazy

Much running around today with little accomplished. So this is my sorry excuse for a post.

Thought for the Day

"All revelations are personal. That's why all revelations are suspect."

~ Neil Gaiman, from American Gods

Bonfire Night

Remember, remember the Fifth of November,

The Gunpowder Treason and Plot,

I can think of no reason

Why the Gunpowder Treason

Should ever be forgot.

Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes, t'was his intent

To blow up the King and Parli'ment.

Three-score barrels of powder below

To prove old England's overthrow;

By God's providence he was catch'd

With a dark lantern and burning match.

Holloa boys, holloa boys, let the bells ring.

Holloa boys, holloa boys, God save the King!

"Feel the Power of Your Vote!"

There is a poll worker in my precinct who has been a volunteer for at least as long as I have lived here (eight and a half years). He is an older black man, with a shock of white hair and a ready smile. Mojo likens him to an economics professor for some reason.

When Mojo got to the polls at our local fire station at 7:00 AM, the man was there, greeting everyone and keeping the mood upbeat and jocular during the hour that Mojo had to wait. Twelve and a half hours later, when I went to cast my vote, he was still there, standing outside and greeting people, finishing the last of his cigarette.

"Are you here to feel the power of your vote?" he asked as we approached the door. Mojo and Arabis talked to him while I registered and went in with my ballot to make history.

As I filled out my form, I could hear Mojo talking to a female fire fighter and her asking Arabis if she'd like to see the engines. From there they disappeared down a hallway while I finished up.

"This is the part that you've got to love, girl," the man told me as I took my ballot to him. "You hold on to that and get ready to cast your ballot. Are you ready to feel the power of your vote?"

I felt like I was at a revival or old time rally like you see in black and white movies.

"I am," I told him.

"Hold on to that with both hands and feed it right in here and FEEL THE POWER OF YOUR VOTE!"

Afterward I wandered into the garage portion of the fire station where an EMT/firefighter named Linda was helping Arabis climb behind the wheel of a fire truck. We talked for a while, I mentioned that I had a friend who was a firefighter in Piedmont (Hey, Dave: Linda in West Oakland says "hi" and that you're awesome!). Arabis wanted to climb up the big ladder on the other truck, and Linda said if we wanted to come back one day that she could climb across it as it lay flat (so it looks like we have a day trip planned sometime soon).

Everyone was happy and laughing and filled with hope. I live in a low-income, predominantly African-American neighborhood with a historically disappointing voter turn out. I over heard the poll workers talking, saying there were only about 350 registered in my precinct and they had already seen over 300 people today. This is unprecedented. The fact that Mojo had to wait an hour this morning is unheard of. That even I, less than an hour before the polls closed, entered to a full house and more people still coming in, gave me hope.

That is what I am struck by. A sense of hope that we have not felt for so many years. I am optimistic and tried to instill some of my excitement in Arabis as we sat watching the returns later that evening.

"We're electing a new president. We're making history."

The Mother, the Maiden and the "Other One"

We're not even dressed up for Halloween, just carrying on the family business: my daughter, my mother and me.

Dia de los Muertos

This is always a bittersweet post for me and I've sat reminiscing before the blank screen now for longer than I care to admit. Last year many in my circles bemoaned the loss of more friends and relatives than we were prepared for (not that one really can prepare for death, despite its inevitability). We cursed 2007 and boasted that 2008 could never be as bad.

It wasn't. It was worse. Too many gone.

I know I've inadvertently omitted names, but I'm lost in the flood of memories.


Rose Rushdoony Deovlet (Grandma Rosie)
Phil Deovlet (Grandpa)
Robert H. Deovlet (Uncle Bob)
Rose (Vartoohi) Mahdesian Deovlet (Grandma Darling)
Benjamin Deovlet (Grandpa Darling)
Richard Deovlet -(Uncle Ricky)
Rose (Vartanoush) Rushdoony (Grandma Rushdoony)
Y.K. Rushdoony (Grandpa Rushdoony)
Mary Movsesian (Auntie Mim)
Spurgeon Avakian (Uncle Sparky)
Ruth Avakian (Auntie Ruthie)
Evelyn Cooper Smith (Grandma Evelyn)
Haywood Smith (Grandpa Haywood)
Joy Deane Wagner
Auntie Margie
Bob Thomas
Dave Ricker
Robin Wadsworth
Michael Hefflin
Maxina Danner (Snookie)
Jennifer Lee
Patrick Lee
Mace Hanley
Shelly Munge
Dan O'Brien
Ricky Paul
Barbara Rose
Ronnie Geoffrion
Dave Coker
Don Mills
Wally Lockwood
Sally Schneider
Linda Underhill
Manny Suarez
Mary Jo Goss
Andrew Small
Phil Robledo
Amethyst Mariani
Theryl O'Ryan
Timur Otus
Brian Dall'Armi
Auntie Posie
Sully (Gordon Sullivan)
Ruth Leggett
Jorge Luis Farias-Martinez
Bill Harris

Not not known personally by me, but deaths that affected me nonetheless:

Tasha Tudor
U. Utah Phillips
Maila Nurmi (aka "Vampira")
Benazir Bhutto


"To absent friends, lost loves, old gods, and the season of mists; and may each and every one of us always give the devil his due."

~ Neil Gaiman

Perspective

Arabis sings to herself, her voice clear and strong, in rhythm with the creak of the swing chain:

"I'm smiling,
And swinging,
And laughing at the clouds!"